Saturday, March 8, 2014

My Life, My girls .....


First question a hardliner or a skeptic would ask: Why do we need a special day to celebrate womanhood?? I would like to ask them back : Why not? We celebrate birthday’s every year to make ourselves feel special. So what’s harm is celebrating woman’s day every year if that allows to make her feel extra special that one day. Does women's day celebration regressive, demeaning to someone ......the answer is no.Then probable question that may be thrown back at  me would why we can’t make them feel special every day. I would say, please go ahead, nobody is stopping you. But most of us forget to do that in the every-day mundane life of ours.

Celebrations are far away thing, dude most of us do not even give them an equal treatment . How many times we ourselves gossip when a woman is successful in her career that she must have slept her way up the ladder. The power flexing in the name of rape, brutality, eve-teasing makes me cringe all the time. The other day I could not sit through the airing of Satyamev Vjayete. All that stormed in my mind was if I could not watch what happened to others, how much pain victims would have experienced. Wish their soul rest in peace and they get another life as a girl and experience all the wonderful things they deserve to get being a girl.

Coming to the point, this blog is not about my views on womanhood. It is about my sharing with you, my experience with all those wonderful women I met all in the journey of my life and how each one in a different way impacted me and in a way made me evolve. The evolution of a human being is through a mother’s womb. Hence it is imperative that mother play probably the most pivotal role in upbringing of a child and probably that’s why education and social awareness of mother is so crucial in building a progressive society that has space for everyone. Well saying my mother is best is very cliche because I feel for every child the best thing that can ever happened to them is their mother.

Me and my mother's relationship evolved with time, it wasn't easy as I was pampered by everyone else except my mother. And I wanted my mother to pamper me and be over-protective about me like most mothers usually are. But she always wanted me to figure out life by my own from the very childhood. While most Bong mom’s would advocate their kids to sit in first bench and only be friend with rank holders, my mother always told me to mix with everyone. Her logic was simple, you need to know the good and the bad- that’s when you learn to bifurcate and choose the best for yourself. During my teens, I was an angry rebel and not the easiest to handle. But our relationship truly evolved when I stepped out of home and started valuing her. Over the years, she has evolved from a mother to more a friend who loves to gossip about her son and his supposed affair.

Her speculations were amusing and at times irritating. She would secretly peep into my face book account or call this cousin of mine to keep a tab on my on-going state of affairs. No pun intended. Once she concluded seeing a Facebook pic that I was secretly married to this friend of mine and she created a huge hullaboo about the same. We had a fight and later concluded, she just had a bad day. Everyone does.

But at the end of the day, I feel whatever goodness in me is there, is her part in me. The sensitivity she inculcated to treat everyone equal, to care & share are lifelong lessons I will cherish. Her efficient handling of household chore made me realize that we celebrate working women we also equally need to celebrate all those house-wives who run the household to make life easy for all other members. Being a housewife is sometimes more challenging profile than a corporate job. So to all mothers and my mother – thanks for being so amazing and choosing to be part of our lives :)

I never had a sister from the same mother. And neither had I ever believed in making other girls my sisters though there was one girl in my B School who told me that she sees a brother in me and I respected that and kept the same that way. Was always one of those kids who preferred to stay mute on that prayer line in school: “All Indians are my brothers and sisters”. However I had these super amazing cousin sisters. Each a fire brand by their own spirts and have no embarrassment in admitting far more qualified than I am today in life. So there was this cousin of mine who was like my childhood hero, and I wanted to always assist her in everything. And then there was another, who was like my guardian angel, always inspired and motivated me. And then there was this tiny meeny cousin of mine who was a unique species of her own. She was short, extremely light yet one should see her feistiness when it came to combat with her own brother. The kicks and the punches would put any guy to same. And then there were my maternal cousins whom we considered Page 3 during our childhood days and always inquisitive about their affairs. The gossips of their lives were our share of Filmfare during our growing days. Seeing these wonderful girls, growing fiercely independent and progressing so well in their respective careers make me feel proud of my family who always treated boys and girls at par and probably girls a little better. Wish it was the story of every Indian Family. At least becomes some day.

Girl Friend is a very dicey term in India. Almost a misnomer Anyways without going into the debate what is what, I must admit to be super lucky to meet some of the most wonderful girls in my life. Each different from each other, each had a flavor of their own but most importantly the memories they created would cherished forever. Some continue to be an integral part of support system, some parted somewhere during the journey but whatever happened was for greater good. At least I would like to believe.

Never been a morning person, and the ones whom an alarm also doesn't help sometimes. There was this friend of mine who used to wake up herself in wee hours of morning just to ensure I catch the morning flight on time. And then we all have this one friend in life who is just there by you whenever needed, she is like who will catch a flight and come to me if I will really want to be by my side – a one hug from her makes me feel empowered and secured.There was this girl whom I really liked. In my B school, as a good gesture, she gave me her favorite dupatta (because I complemented her a lot on same) along with a letter that was written with paint brush. These special gifts and memories is what make our lives worthwhile. Like I have this friend with whom I have this coffee and brownie connect or a friend with whom we discuss all film gossips. During B-school and college, I had this staunch supporters of mine who would be blindly stand by me in whatever I do. Boy, they made me so confident in life. Each relationship is unique and each counts. I am indebted to each of them for special memories.

Have off late been to this blogging world, and it is so wonderful to know some co-bloggers who are female and so so talented. In this competitive world, they not only guided me but also mentored me, helped with my some of my works and assisted me in taking some crucial decision in this career field. And there are so many more wonderful women I met– some in college, some in B-school, some in office, in extended family and some in social networking sites who were amazing in their own ways. Does that mean every girl that I came across was angel- no; I met some mean ones as well. But then good and bad has nothing to do with gender right?? Thankfully my stars are blessed with few good women starting from my mother who weave a little bit of magic around my life.

 I don’t care if Women’s day is symbolic or commerce driven, I am all for it as long as it makes someone happy or special. May be some day we will have a Men's day too. Think about it how proud we would feel when our girlfriend/wife or daughter achieves something in life and we proudly say : My girl. Yes they belong to us. They need to be nourished, educated and celebrated. Not brutally raped or murdered.

N.B  The images used here are taken from Google images.